That attribute that was consistently stated when discussing qualities of one’s ideal future connection was an effective “husband” who was simply financially stable. Female conveyed more viewpoints on what it thought it designed to getting financially stable. Particular women discussed its companion because only seller towards the family relations and others demonstrated its lover given that adding to the household cash. Over and over again, people reported that they need lovers which you are going to “enable you.” People just weren’t specific in regards to the variety of jobs otherwise career you to their greatest spouse might have, but had been precise that occupations must provide “sufficient to spend its costs or what they you would like in daily life.” Other new member revealed their best mate a someone that “…cannot owe people money and you happen to be playing with my currency to blow them right back; no you should be economically stable, have a great house, a beneficial work, a good occupations…” Ladies including discussed its mate becoming independent and not looking for to use them to have one thing. This price catches these thinking: “I’d want them to be a success, instance someone who can feel independent, style of. They will stand-on her a couple base if i wasn’t doing.”
Mission based
Inside most to help you are economically steady, girls need a future lover who was “goal-centered.” While they did not give certain all about just what these types of needs might be, females arranged that their ideal companion perform “need to be encouraged to do something the help of its lifestyle. They can’t sit on the couch for the remainder of their lives and do absolutely nothing. That is a big situation.” Various other girl described they this way, “If i enjoys my entire life with her therefore cannot, you have to go, … I just want someone who has its lifestyle together with her, you never know what they want, what they’re creating … you just have to have your lead correct; you need to have good head-on your arms.” Once the other example, one to woman described another lover within these conditions: “Your gotta have potential, you gotta currently have some thing taking place with on your own since if I have one thing going on that have me, I am not probably correspond with some one that is creating something quicker. So you actually have to have one thing choosing your self that will in truth make me personally actually have an explanation to even cam for your requirements.”
Talk
Ladies offered careful and you can expressive statements regarding their relationships values. Whenever given the possible opportunity to discuss its hopes and you can wishes to possess current and you can future dating, female offered self-confident depictions out of relationship and marriage with a suitable partner. So it portrayal is somewhat weighed against much current search which too often depicts Dark colored lady as susceptible with the exposure involvement and you will unhealthy behaviors (Sullivan, Childs, & O’Connell, 2010). Suggestions learned from these interview with techniques dispels the notion that all Ebony lady don’t realize suit relationships qualities (Raiford et al., 2007). Girls within this sample described its better relationship having fun with terminology one to represent confident thinking of adolescent current and you will coming matchmaking.
Ideal Relationships Relationships when you look at the High school
Similarities and variations had been one another clear off Ebony girls’ narratives about an excellent relationships relationship, now and in the future. Several templates emerged from their dysfunction of one’s better dating while in the highschool: (1) temporariness regarding MЕЇj poslednГ blog highschool relationships, (2) having a partner just who shared comparable knowledge and you can career preparations, and you will (3) significance of family members into the distinguishing an ideal relationship. Different templates emerged in their description of your finest coming relationships: (1) interest in relationships, (2) financial stability, and (3) desires mainly based. Likewise, in its characterization of your own best matchmaking during high-school and in the long run, woman talked about a desire for ‘best friend’ features such as for example admiration, believe, and trustworthiness. It’s promising to listen that teenage African american women lay well worth in these qualities and you may earnestly seek them within their close relationships.